He Tore A Hamstring Dot Mee Dot UK

Taking the Tebbitt Test … and Failing

It seems quite apt in the week of a General Election that my mind should be taken aback to a certain Lord Tebbitt, and his infamous Cricket Test. Whilst for the more politicised it serves as a reminder that the issues over immigration are hardly novel, for me it simply indicates that politicians were as absurd in 1990 as they are now.

“A large proportion of Britain’s Asian population fail to pass the cricket test. Which side do they cheer for? It’s an interesting test. Are you still harking back to where you came from or where you are?”

I prefer to speak of the good fortune of those of us from immigrant families … simply, it’s the best of both worlds!! I am personally very proud to say that I would have horribly failed The Tebbitt Cricket Test … although I may have passed certain others that he may have set.

I am West Indian and very proud of it … besides, I dare any of you to approach my Dad and Godfather (pictured below) and suggest that their sons support England!!

Had Norm (I hope that he does not mind me being quite so familiar ) decided on a Rugby Test, I would like to think that I would have passed with a merit, if not distinction. I have after all been proud to go and Swing My Chariot in most parts of the globe.

Were there a Football Test, I suspect that I would pass, although I might fall foul of any rule regarding ‘Club versus Country’! Essentially, given the choice of a Liverpool Title or England World Cup, I would be going with red! That’s not to say mind you that either is likely to happen at any time soon!

I suppose that when it comes to cricket, the West Indies come above all others. I would think it accurate to say that I am fairly neutral otherwise, although those who know me better might raise a smile at that comment.

They might have noted over the years that an Australian fiancée, a childhood with much time spent in South Africa, Grandparents of Indian and Pakistani descent, I may have occasionally supported these countries in their battles against England. Come to think of it, I once saw Sri Lanka on a map which was enough for me to back them at The Oval!!

England has been very good to me, and its Rugby team has given me some of my best memories. But when it comes to cricket, I can always refer back to the words of Rudolph Walker in Love Thy Neighbour:-

“You invented it, but WE PLAY IT BETTER!”

Whilst that has not always been technically true in more recent times, hope remains unbounded. Hence at 6.30pm this evening, my television will be tuned to Guyana National Stadium in Providence as the host nation, West Indies, take on England in the ICC World Twenty20.

Win or lose, we will party to the sweet beat of Soca, the taste of Demerara Rum, and the beautiful sound of leather on willow! So remember, HERE COMES THE WEST INDIES!