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If Only

If only I could smile, if only I could laugh, if only I could dream.

If only we were 6 weeks ago when she was still here & life meant something. If only she was here to see me open the gifts that she’d already bought. If only she were here to open her own presents.

If only life still had any meaning or made any sense. If only the very special people around me could negate the pain.

If only my life was the same.

If only my soulmate and guardian angel were with me and I could tell her how much I loved her and how much I looked forward to our wedding.

If only it felt like Christmas. If only I could hold Dani once more.

If only is only a dream.